In my book, hotels get bonus points if you can’t get a mobile phone signal. T-Mobile gave up the ghost well before I was anywhere near the Old Dungeon Ghyll, so I was already in a good mood as I trundled along the narrow lane from Grasmere, praying no vehicles would be coming in the opposite direction and gawping, slack-jawed, at the lushness of the scenery.

The hotel is three centuries old and must be in one of the remotest spots in England, looking up at the rugged peaks of the Langdale Pikes. It is a favourite of walkers, cyclists and climbers, so forget your Manolos and pashminas, and pack hiking boots, fleece and Fido’s biscuits (dogs are welcome).

The Old Dungeon Ghyll has 13 rooms and doesn’t pretend to be something it’s not. The bedroom and hallway carpets and wallpaper have that early 1980s feel, while there is no television and only one payphone in the hall. But the light and airy lounge has a lovely view, a crackling fire in winter, board games and a stack of old National Geographic magazines and Hello! Neil and Jane Walmsley, who run the National Trust property, put on music evenings the first Wednesday of each month and there are spontaneous jam sessions, depending on who’s around.

I wanted to eat at the hotel (four-course meals use homegrown or local products where possible and are good value at £21.50, including coffee), but I stayed on a quiet Monday and was asked if I would mind having a bar meal instead. The Hikers’ Bar next door was a cowshed at one time and has a spit-and-sawdust feel, but the Linoleum flooring makes sense against muddy boots and wet dogs. My Cumberland sausage and chips with a pint of Old Peculiar came to £9.

Breakfast the next morning in the hotel dining room was well above average: as a fry-up aficionado, I would rate the bacon as some of the tastiest I’ve had this year.

“We’re not an airs-and- graces hotel,” Neil said as I left. If you want a whirlpool bath, Molton Brown smellies and Phillipe Starck lampshades, the Old Dungeon Ghyll won’t be for you. But if you’re after good value, decent grub and a friendly welcome slap bang in the middle of the most gorgeous scenery in the country, you’re in the right place.



Bottom line: Will Hide paid £45 for a B&B single (doubles from £90).

Need to know: Old Dungeon Ghyll Hotel, Great Langdale, Ambleside, Cumbria (015394 37272, www.odg.co.uk).

Access all areas: No, but owners say that they are happy to help disabled guests where possible.

Room: 7 out of 10.

Food: 7 out of 10.

Service: 7 out of 10.

Setting: 11 out of 10.

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